Devon Help Us

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Devon Help Us

Post  Boz1964 on Wed Sep 27, 2017 2:41 pm

Devon Help Us

Last week's match against Royston Town saw Ashley Evans become man of the match, but this weeks man of the match was a different form of ashes.

On his favourite night of the week - a Tuesday football special - saw a small but loyal band of fans and friends say a final goodbye to one of their own, in the form of the cremains of the legend that was Granville Morris.

It was a fitting end for a lifelong Merthyr Fan and Football supporter that the opponents were Tiverton Town, as we had visited the Ladymead Ground together and even taken a photo of him 'taking the Grange End' in the form of the Directors Box- sitting there proudly like he was the Duke of Devonshire.

Now Granville Morris was a smart man and always attended matches both home and away in a jacket and trousers and in the latter years with a Merthyr Tie to boot- so he would have been rightly proud of the Tiverton manager, Martyn Rogers neatly attired in a suit on the touch line at Penydarren Park last night.

Now the seasoned veteran manager has been known to visit Wembley twice before to pick up a Vase or two but I didn't think it appropriate to invite him over for our sprinkling, even if our stadium is being redeveloped with new grey Lego seating (left over from the modelling) and is now christened the new Webley.

In a Jimmy Saville-Row suit, he looked the business to all the guys and gals, as he stood calm and collected, whilst his Tiverton Town table topping team, went about their act of self- destruction by getting on the wrong side of the referee.

It started inside the first minute when their 10, Levi Landricombe decided to shoulder barge the off- balance Kyle Patton after he had played the ball away.

A cheap shot you would say but it set the tone for the night, as referee Daniel Flynn just sighed deeply and  raised his arm indicating the foul.

I think he knew it would be one of those nights when he would need not just his notebook but the 'Yellow Pages'  for this Tiverton lot.

True, it was the most controversial shoulder charge since Alexis Colby fought Krystle Carrington in US Soap Dynasty but Flynn was not impressed.

The Tiverton cause was not helped by their attitude towards the official either, as their version of Lord Palmerston Gunboat Diplomacy-after their famous MP -was always likely to get them into more hot water than a Regent Street jacuzzi.

It didn't help either that their choice of video on the coach trip down was the 'Battle of Santiago' football match of 1962 between Chile and Italy.

Now I must admit I was wrong, as when I heard the team line-up announced on the tannoy, my heart sank a bit.

I thought another 3-5-2 line-up and yet another non-start without 'fielding' local hero Kerry Morgan was like the inclusion of Mighty Boosh's Noel on Bake-Off and would be a recipe for disaster.

Instead - it proved a masterstroke from SuperGav & Clarkie and produced a first half of such quality not seen at the hallowed 3G this season.

Poor old Tiverton RFC couldn't get the ball off Merthyr, as the crowd oohed and aahered at the passing and high tempo of the Merthyr Team and that wasn't even the Devon vocal yokels either.

Merthyr had more possession than a Gurnos Drug dealer's rap sheet.

They played it along the backline with aplomb, with Adam Davies and Jarrad Wright stroking the ball down the flank for the hard running Bristol loanee Cameron Pring to turn on the footballing 'gas' and threaten the Tiverton defence.

It was total football and led to the Devon Lads chasing shadows, making their tackles look clumsy, ill-timed or on occasion just plain violent.

None of which impressed the Dan in Black one bit.

It was a crying shame that the referee wasn't sitting in judgement this week instead of the Criminal Court Judge that let that posh Oxford Student, Miss Demeanour, off with the stabbing.

I suspect that he would have donned the black cap instead.

So it was inevitable that their 9 got his marching orders, after old sandpaper head took one too many 'liberties' with Swansea stadium stalwart Scott Tancock.

Kicking someone after the ball is silly but suggesting afterwards that official's  parents are not correctly married is pure stupidity.

As he trudged off tattoos flaring angrily, his manager knew then that the game was up- and he  had let not only the side down but also their two away supporters  - in the same way that his tailor had let his Manager down.

Before that it had been the Jaye Bowen show - as the youngster put on a dazzling display not witnessed by the Tiverton Massive since the Glamping Festival at Devon Yurts.

He worked the centre of the pitch, picking up the ball from defence, drove through the Away midfield scattering footballing pedestrians like a Saudi woman with a provisional driving licence.

He was a real pain in the side to the Devonnites, as Bowen combined the fancy footwork of John Stones with the flair of Frenchman Eric Cantona ( Gaul Stones?) as his slide rule passes and touch were exquisite and a joy to watch.

At one point Ownes had to close my mouth, which was open in awe to prevent the multitude of moths attracted to the floodlights from entering the aperture and which were included by error in the Evo-Stik Premier attendance figures.

It was a burst of pace from the 'Home Grown' student of the Gurnos school of science that led to the well taken first goal from Elliott Richards.

In recent weeks,  I thought that his real name was Elli and the OTT on the end of his Christian name stood for Over The Top- but today his shot was unstoppable even by the quality Tiverton Keeper Martin Rice, and one that even the Greek Gods of Olympus (and new recruit Granville Morris) would be proud of.

After all it was pure ambrosia which creamed Rice.

If Tiverton could have got the ball then it might have been a different story - as their Welsh Nightmare continued when Ian Traylor added insult to their attempts at injury by tapping home from close range just before half-time.

2-0 down with a man short and a nervous Manager, whose suit had to be back in the Tiverton Burtons Shop Window by 9.00 am the following morning does not add up to a happy half time cream tea- with the game effectively 'scone'.

The first period of the second half was much the same with Captain Marble disrupting more Tiverton play than a Devonshire school dinner lady.

Manager Rogers knew he needed to change his formation and encourage his top Devon sprinting asset, Landricombe to Dart Moor.

And bizarrely with ten men the Away Side suddenly started to look more dangerous than
playing pass the parcel in a Belfast Pub.

As the game entered its final quarter, the Tiverton underdogs started to dominate and goalkeeper Oliver Davies was forced to put down his newspaper and make a save or two.

He even got clobbered by the big Tiverton Centre Half for his trouble and after receiving a blow to the face when catching a high ball, was seen scouring the penalty box looking for one of his missing teeth.

He was heard to ask politely  'Ben Mammola .....where's my molar?' .

And then with 20 minutes left on the Oliver Davies alarm clock, the Merthyr Management decided to make some changes and took off Ian Traylor- who was back to his brilliant best tonight-.

Suddenly, Merthyr had no outlet and the ball kept coming back like a swing-ball, as the physicality of the Tiverton defence offered no safe haven for substitute Mo Touray.

As Merthyr lost its rhythm, Tiverton seized the initiative and a free-kick awarded in a dangerous place proved fatal.

Up stepped the Yellow Peril himself Levi Landricombe to hit 'the golden shot' over the wall into the net to give Tivvy another foothold in the game ( they had previously been penalised for foot-holding too by the referee).

Levi- the Jean-ius, had scored the same goal over and over since he was aged ten on his PlayStation Football game but tonight it was for real.

The goal was pure brilliance - straight out of the Kyle Copp top drawer.

He was such a good player in those long yellow Stanley Matthews shorts - imagine how good he could have been if he was able to run too.

This goal galvanised the Devonnites and for the final quarter Merthyr were hanging on against ten men, until Stuart Fleetwood incurred the wrath of the all-seeing referee and evened up the mathematics.

As the final whistle blew, it was a relieved Boz who stood at the urinal in Webley's.

In the end, the Merthyr Fans were treated to a wonderful first half, a man of the match performance from Jaye Bowen and the resurgence of Ian Traylor.

The only negative was the dismissal of Fleetwood and the inevitable three game ban for violent conduct.

Who will play up front?

Devon Help Us.

I think I know a phone number of a Dowlais Boy who wears a cape.


Last edited by Boz1964 on Thu Sep 28, 2017 1:15 pm; edited 2 times in total (Reason for editing : Dyslexia)

Posts : 2006
Join date : 2012-10-08

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