Where was Lee?

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Where was Lee?

Post  Boz1964 on Wed Aug 02, 2017 1:41 pm

Where was Lee?

A mad dash from work, shower and change inside 20 minutes, eating a microwaved pastie that was still cooking inside my ruminant stomach system preceded my joining the Ownes-mobile for a 42 mile , hour long,  midweek trip to see Merthyr Town take on Llanelli in a pre-season.

As we 'Trundled' ( credit *Ownes) along down the A470 and M4 the talk turned to the chance of watching centre stage the greatest Swansea player never signed by Everton- that of the uber-talented Lee Trundle- and all for the pitiful sum of £5.00 too ( Credit card *Ownes)

It doesn't matter that he may be the same age as our Assistant Manager- the online videos of his skill and showboating are testament to the quality of a footballer who was a quality entertainer but sadly never got to play at the highest level-for Merthyr Town that is.

Not having been to Stebonheath Park in Llanelli before, I was eagerly anticipating watching this cult hero, scoring from the halfway line against a Merthyr side that doesn't even have a registered goalkeeper.

The crowd resplendent in their red and white bobble hats, red scarfs, which were needed in that biting wind and thick milk-bottled glasses made me raise the question.....Where's Wally?....

And when the home side trooped out minus the Swansea Ambassador and former Mr Atomic Kitten - it raised the question.....Where was Lee? ( think about it)

There were plenty of 'Scarlet' women around but not the striker that has been the most source of  'Turkish' Delight at Llanelli AFC.

Now one man does not make a team-unless you are playing solitaire- but missing a player with league experience and such quality is bound to having an effect- which begged another question where was our Manager Gavin Williams?

Was he busy honing his big 'Sky Sports' speech for the Merthyr Fans for the 'crisis' meeting on Thursday night hosted by Anthony Scaramucci?

Or was he scouting out a goalkeeper worth his salt ready for the forthcoming campaign?

So you can imagine the worry frown that crossed my Botox forehead, when I heard the whisper Gav is gone?

Especially, as only Clarkie was evident in charge of rallying the troops from the sidelines.

You know what footballing rumours are like and how they start on forums like ours....after all I once heard that Merthyr Town were insolvent but in reality, we had just been admitted to the
Evo-Stik Premier League (think about it).

After drinking a pre-match pint of beer in the Clubhouse,  I was 'Felinfoel' enough already to think we had lost our biggest asset and major crowd draw but fortunately, with my dodgy hearing it was one of own supporters with indigestion asking for Gaviscon ( think about it).

And I am not surprised he had such complaint, as the human locust was clad in a Park View Martyrs tee-shirt covered in pie crumbs, pasty grease and red sauce.

Clearly the phrase ' Sospan Fach ' didn't apply in his case - more like 'Sospan Mawr'.

On the pitch, the two teams from Iron Town and Tin Town, went head to head and despite missing its two biggest players, didn't disappoint.

Llanelli started the brighter with a slick passing and movement game that initially had Merthyr on the back foot with their 8 and 11 looking particularly dangerous and should have opened the Reds account, bar for an overzealous far sided linesman, who clearly wasn't frightened to raise his flag for offside.

Inside the first 15 minutes of the match,  I was beginning to think it was made from viagra,  as it was continually being raised anytime a Llanelli player's five o'clock shadow crossed the pitch.

My fears were that the flying winger clad in shocking pink 'Lord Raglan' pub coloured boots would be our undoing, as the Merthyr defence started slower than a Terry Griffiths' century break.

But as the game went on, the Merthyr players started to adjust to the strange natural surface they were playing football on.

The biggest positive of the night was seeing the return of Jarrad Wright to his defensive slot.

The guy is more solid than the Terminator and how could Clarkie argue with the Rhondda Schwarzenegger when he selected his own playing position, refusing to be put in midfield.

"I'll be (centre) back" was enough to convince the Hereford Quadagenarian he had met his match- as did the big Llanelli number 9.

And whilst the 'man of steel ' playing in his comeback game did look a little rusty , once he had Vinny Jonesed' the nut sack of the opposition striker, he had him in his pocket and it freed up the other Merthyr players to venture forward with a little more freedom.

Next up to shine was Kerry Morgan.

Having recently changed his name by deed poll to Geri Williams, the former Swan picked up the ball in midfield and ran at the Llanelli defence, who retreated quicker than a Wayne Rooney hairline - allowing him to let fly with a rocket shot from outside the box that flew passed former Martyrs keeper Craig Morris, to a rapturous applause from the entire stadium- -all 280 fans that is.

Goal of the Season in August?

Who needs Trundle?

Within ten minutes this question was also asked by the Home Team, as the ever impressive
pink-enhanced 11 combined with the gifted 8 , tripped the light fantastic of the linesman and slotted the ball passed our temporary keeper, Gravell Path for a beautiful crafted equaliser.

Some of the one-touch football from the Home Side was 'absolutely fabulous' to watch and it was clear that his boots had definitely come out of the closet and that he wasn't
just in Flash a Shoe (Think about it).

And suddenly despite the absence of the newspaper headlining 'Llanelli Star' a new hero was born.

A power struggle then developed between Jarrad Wright and the brothers Patton and the attacking Turks not seen since the Crimean War.

But the Master of the Dark Rhondda Arts is skilled in means both fair and foul and used every trick in the book to disrupt the Home Players just when they started to get on top.

Halftime came with honours even at 1-1 and a great advert for non-league football leaving both sections of the crowd wanting more.

And BBC commentator Huw Edwards was so impressed with the quality of his native Llanelli FC's performance, explained that he would have offered to take a gender gap balancing pay cut on his Beeb Salary but he needed to keep Trundle at the Stebonheath for another season.

The game ebbed and flowed with so many chances at both ends the scoreline could have been 7-7 had it not been for great keeping from Gravell and Morris and the odd longer toenail required to push the ball home.

Even with changes with personnel, the chances still kept coming and with the pace of both sets of wingers on a wide pitch the scene was set for more goals to come.

It was a real surprise how Corey Jenkins didn't add his name to the scoresheet, as the flying winger made one long burst from his own half that saw him running passed a couple of posts before eventually being named the Winner of the 8:15 pm race at Ffos Las night meeting.

Like two punch drunk boxers on the ropes, both teams slugged it out, looking for an opportunity to land that knockout blow to their rival.

When it came, it was not down to skill or creativity but a huge slice of 'Loughor'.

The high pressing game so encouraged by Clarkie, suddenly paid dividends as our headless midfielder Kyle Copp stole the ball from the feet of a Llanelli defender and slid the ball passed the scarecrow-like replacement keeper for a 2-1 lead.

What a difference a goal can make to a pre-season, as Dean Clarke set off Mourinho-like with his notebook in hand doing the Ayatolloh until he realised he better hang onto the remaining follicles he still had.

Copp too suddenly grew in confidence and inches too.

In the first half, he looked like he was 3 foot 6 but after his goal, he suddenly appeared to be the towering figure of over 4 feet, even it was so cold in that offshore breeze that he had to keep one hand inside his Merthyr shirt at all times.

His influence on the game improved too, as he suddenly became Midfield General Coppoleon.

The mark of a good player is the speed of delivery of the ball and his style changed from the Ray Wilkins 'crab passing' of the first half into 'slide rule' ones for Traylor, Pegasus Jenkins and the hard running Fleetwood.

The latter too has impressed me with his speed of thought and burst of pace over the short distance- it no wonder that Fleetwood has such an impressive scoring record as he looks the champion of lost causes- otherwise why else would he have signed for Merthyr Town?

And he was so unlucky not to be credited with the third goal, as he did all but score it beating, keeper and woodwork only for the ever 'mobile' Traylor to mug the striker like he was a hoodie on a moped with a brick for the final touch.

In fairness, Traylor did try and return the compliment to Fleetwood with a clever pass in the box seconds later but unfortunately for once the striker wasn't alert to the possibility.

In the end, it was a great match played in great spirit by two improving teams.

True - Llanelli were no Cardiff Metropolitan University side but the Management must be pleased to get another pre-season win under their belt and signs that our players will gel as consistency of selection improves.

Some questions were asked of the Merthyr players last night and they found some answers.

But three big questions still remain?

Can this current squad of players cut it at Southern Premier League level?

Where will SuperGav find a keeper to fit the bill suited to a Merthyr Budget?

And was Trundle at home watching his 'beloved' Soccer AM DVDs ....Where was Lee?


PS: I will probably now be blocked from the Trundle Twitter Page again (last time I think he suspected he was being trolled by Vincent Tan)

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