Rebels without a pause

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Rebels without a pause

Post  Boz1964 on Sat Nov 12, 2016 11:06 am

Rebels without a Pause.

It was Trophy time again in Merthyr and over the last few seasons we have managed to amass quite a few too.

Today, saw the return of the Rebel Army from Slough Town to Penydarren Park together with their Supporters Radio Show - the 'Slipped Discs'.

It was a mouthwatering prospect with the repeat match of two of the top teams in our League clashing on the field once more and it certainly didn't disappoint.

After an immaculately observed minutes silence for the Fallen in the Great Wars, both sides set about reopening old war wounds and renewing acquaintances on the football field

It was Slough to fire the first shot in anger, as they hit the left upright of keeper Oliver Davies 'last post' inside the first few minutes.

The Swansea Boy spreading himself Schmeichelesquely to look so large that the man from 'Twin Town' looked like two goalies.

Thanks to that early let-off, the Home Side were stung into action and took the lead inside ten minutes, when a cross from the left, found the head of that Ginger Giant Josh Yorwerth and Merthyr were one up.

Some fans were still fighting their way, Indiana Jones-style, with machetes passed the jungle of weeds that infest the steps adjacent to the Pontmorlais YMCA and missed the towering figure of 'the Big Red One' putting his Unit in front.

The Slough defence on the other hand, looked like they were posing for the
'Mannequin Challenge', as the only player Merthyr possess, who is taller than 5 foot and a Welshcake headed the ball home.

The goal spurred on the home side, who suddenly started to dominate possession.

Merthyr began to put together some lovely free flowing football with the likes of Barrow, Richards and Traylor showing their class against a decent Berkshire outfit.

Whilst on the sideline every Slough counter thrust was being carefully choreographed by the joint managers Baker & Underwood.

Before the game, I had read that Slough possessed a secret weapon in the shape of Fulham loanee 'Elijah' Adebayo.

I didn't wish to be 'prophetic' but after the earlier game between the two evenly matched sides which ended in a draw, I expected much the same result today.

This time I hoped the Berkshire Boys would cope better with Welsh Altitude and 'Gravity' and not fall over at the slightest touch.

Today with the availability of the new frontman, the Primary Slough tactic designed to reach the next round of the competition was to lump the ball forward to the towering youngster operating as a lone striker and feed off his power play.

Muscular 'A' Trophy if you like.

But this was certainly a 'wasting' tactic, as Gethin Jones was busily rolling back the years and on occasion - the ears- to out muscle the youngster.

Both he and the unmoving figure of Jarrad Wright made sure there was little headway for the Away side and kept the pressure on their back four for the majority of the first half.

With the pace of Traylor, Refell and the clever forward play of McLaggon, they made the normal fleet footed Rebel defence and tactics of their Management look like Slough Coaches.

Merthyr pressed hard for a second and got it when the ball was threaded out again to the right wing once more and an incisive cross-field ball from Captain Marble was 'downloaded' to Kaynomite, who rifled a rocket shot passed the Slough keeper for two nil.

It shows what I know about football, as I was screaming at him to leave it, as Stealth Bomber Vapour Traylor was gliding in unmarked at the far post.

With the halftime whistle blowing very elegantly, Merthyr were up by two and  I was delighted even though secretly, I just knew there were goals in this Slough side.

Whilst Merthyr had a Trophy Buildbase in place, I still felt that the game was not over until Vanessa Feltz had finished warbling.

Especially, as we had for the first time in my recollection a female referee in charge.

Now I do not wish to be exiled with Andy Gray and Richard Keys ( who coincidentally have applied to be future presenters of Rebel Radio) to the outpost of the Middle East over the female official - a refershe?- as she wasn't helped by the linesman on our near side, who missed a nasty lunge on Barrow, near the touch line, shortly before the first away goal which left him hobbling.

Now Barrow is of a different temperament  to the firebrand Captain Marble and despite having two- he didn't fly off the handle - over the unnecessary foul.

Slough then got their first from a breakaway on the right, in which two men were allowed to gallop free, when our left back had gone AWOL following a foray behind enemy Slough lines.

Jarrad Wright tried to climb but couldn't get over the Moone and substitute Charlie struck to the delight of the Confederate Army busting for the toilet and whistling Dixie on the Theatre End.

Once Slough realised that the Merthyr defence was not like a Novice Nun at a Merthyr convent and could therefore be penetrated- they redoubled their efforts and snatched a second, when an away striker was bundled over near the edge of the box.

At first I thought that stand-in Oliver Davies' keeper needed to take some lessons on how to erect a Wall from President Donald Trump, but mobile video footage on the Slough Town Twitter Feed shows Elijah profiting by shoving the last defender with his 'Kardashian' to allow room for number 7 - to pick his spot and the ball to nestle in the far corner of the net.

Annoyingly the 'foul-ham' was missed by all those in charge, the refershe, her nearside assistant and his seeing-eye guide dog.

It was the first time all game that the number 9 had come alive, as prior to this this the Fulham loanee player had moved less than the Michael Jackson statue outside Craven Cottage.

With the game now level, both sides went in search of a winner- as a draw and replay in the Trophy didn't really suit either side in their quest for automatic promotion.

On the sidelines with every Slough attack, the twin managers of Slough, leapt about in synchronised harmony like two dancers from the Royal Sadlers Wells Ballet , as they were not satisfied with the Cockney rhyming slang scoreline of a 'Desmond'

(Boz Note- a Desmond Tutu - 2-2 or the sound the Panta Claus train makes at the Brecon Mountain Railway for the uninitiated).

In the dying minutes of the game, things got even better for the away managers, as their 7 tackled Captain Marble from behind and then got his quiff caught in Home Captains' shorts to which the combative midfielder responded in claret, by seeing red not just in the form of Josh Heyworth galloping in to help, but also in the form of a red card from the red-lipsticked Model in charge.

As dog-of war Evans departed down the catwalk, it was so humorous in the Slough technical area, as there was a version of the 'Great British Baker- Off', as they know that Merthyr will struggle to find a suitable replacement for Captain Marble, as the Merthyr dog pound is not open for business until after the scheduled replay on Tuesday Evening.

Once again, whilst Evans reacted to the unnecessary challenge - the Slough midfielder who caused the problem, benefitted from committing the initial foul and has helped disrupt our already depleted midfield for the rematch.

In the end, Merthyr won the first half and Slough the second and with Carlsberg probability was overall the correct result.

Slough Town- unlike most sides that have played at the Loadlok Stadium this season - played for the full 90 minutes without stopping.

For this reason alone, the 'Rebels without a Pause' deserved their draw.

Which leaves us with an exciting replay in prospect for Tuesday Night.

Let's hope that 'Rebel Radio' will for the sake of us full time workers 'pump up the jam' and broadcast the game for us people keeping the post-Brexit economy going to enjoy.

Boz


Last edited by Boz1964 on Sat Nov 12, 2016 2:30 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : Clearing up misapprehension)
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Boz1964

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Re: Rebels without a pause

Post  OWNES1 on Sat Nov 12, 2016 12:13 pm

Thanks for the mention, hope social were not filming me for benefit reasons when I celebrated the goals.

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'Back' to the Future

Post  Boz1964 on Sat Nov 12, 2016 12:22 pm

I wouldn't worry about it Ownes.

You have paid more tax than the U.S. President this year anyway.

Boz
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Re: Rebels without a pause

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